Taylor Lautner – Action Hero?
Filed under: Dumb Ideas, Media Report, Movies, Worst of the Worst
To my dismay, it’s been announced that Paramount has signed Taylor Lautner to star in the big-screen adaptation of Max Steele, automatically anointing him as the next big action hero.
Sure, the kid is good looking and has some athletic ability – so what? Doesn’t an action hero require a certain amount of gravitas and life experience? Lautner’s biggest concern in his life to date has been a zit.
Not to mention the kid is a fag … that never goes over well with the popcorn crowd.
Adam Lambert Sucks It
Filed under: Freaks, Live Performances, Media Report, Media Weirdness, Music, Public Humiliation, Who Gives a Shit, Worst of the Worst
The music world is buzzing today after last night’s American Music Awards telecast. Of course, they’re not talking about the awards given out, which were ridiculous (Michael Jackson? Please …). Nor were they talking about the great performances, mainly because there weren’t any.
No, they’re all in a tizzy because Adam Lambert, the drag queen runner-up from last year’s American Idol, debuted a horrid new song from his upcoming album. In the process, he simulated getting head from some dude, and then kissing another dude. For artistic shock reasons, no doubt.
Adam’s panties are all bunched up today as he defends his lewd choices in his performance. Frankly, he should be more concerned about the terrible song he was singing, or the fact that he sounded like a heavily-medicated Axl Rose on fire. It was an awful, silly performance of a rancid song, and it should effectively kill his career before it starts.
Thank God. Sometimes fate does everyone a solid.
Sliimy Little Cocksucker
Anyone unfamiliar with Perez Hilton’s website will probably not know Sliimy (pronounced “slim-ee”), a new French musician/artist/weirdo who has signed to Perez Hilton’s new record label. Perez has, in true entrepreneurial style, talked endlessly about Sliimy as if he’s the next Michael Jackson … but I find it hard to believe that straight, club-obsessed America really wants music like this. He seems like a faggier version of Prince, which seems like a difficult thing to do.
Karma’s A Bitch
Filed under: Freaks, Funny, Good Grief, Internet Stupidity, Karmic Justice, Media Report, Media Weirdness, Miscellaneous Awesomeness, Music, Perfection, Who Gives a Shit, Worst of the Worst
The Frankenberry of gossip – Perez Hilton – has been claiming today that he was attacked Sunday night by the entourage of Will.I.Am of The Black Eyed Peas.
Not to be insensitive, but that rude, snivelling faggot had it coming.